The Bargainista

Thursday, April 29, 2010

Bargainista Lingo:

1. Bargainista – A true bargain fiend who finds exuberance in saving money, often sacrificing her body to do so.

2. START THE CAR! – This phrase comes from the IKEA commercial with the incredibly dorky woman in her Volvo wagon. When she sees the savings that she received, she runs from the building, screaming, “START THE CAR” before they can chase her down and charge her more.

3. Negotiations – Of course, negotiations occur at flea markets and garage sales. However, it is appropriate to negotiate in retail stores if you find an item that you are willing to purchase that is damaged or missing pieces. Most managers offer 10% or more off a damaged item.

4. Aw HELL yeah! – This is the expletive that slips from your mouth when you get to the register and something is on MORE of a sale than you expected.

5. SCORE! – This exclamation arises when you arrive at a store that you typically frequent, only to find that the whole place is on sale.

6. Robbing The Place – This takes place when one leaves a store spending little to no personal money. After coupons and rebates, merchandise is taken off their hands, without compromising the budget.

7. Hoarding – An item is on such an incredible sale that one must purchase all that the store has in stock. Thus, hoarding occurs.

Disclaimer: Bargainista Side Effects – Side effects of being a true Bargainista include sore feet, hunger, paper cuts, and a seriously bad attitude if someone gets in the way of a bargain. You should not become a Bargainista if you are unwilling to incur bodily injury due to your bargaining ways.